Saturday, April 10, 2021

5. ...SO WHAT?!



        Rumor has it that Pete Davidson has FINALLY! moved out of his mom's and my reaction is, OKAAAAAAAYYYYYY, SO WHAT? I moved out when I was 25. I have cousins still living with their parents. My husband does not understand this. Oh culture, how different you are!

A friend who once said, "I am okay if a Mexican man still lives with his family. But if it's a white guy living in his mom's basement, I have to think about it." She is white. She's dated mostly Latino men, except for the father of her first child.

My husband is white. He was out of his house as soon as he was able to afford it. It's the "American" way. It's what every person should do after high school. Be independent. Live your life. 
I'm full blooded Mexican, in case you don't know (see picture to the left of me being a silly goose). I lived with my immediate family until I was twenty-five years old and I would have stayed there if I didn't have other plans of my own. That's the Mexican way - we stay with our parents until they're old and possibly take charge of the family. We do not send our parents or grandparents to nursing homes, even if they are sick. We find a way to make it work and take care of them. My Grandma lived with my uncles for years until the day she left us. My uncles' wives, luckily, are wonderful women who cared for my Grandma in health, sickness, and deathbed. I am forever grateful they were there when I couldn't. I told my husband my mother will most likely move in with us when she's old - though she says she does not want to stay here when she's old and unable to work. She wants to go back to Mexico and the rest of her life with the other kids she left behind. We will have a chance to go and visit by that time. I get it and I know at the end of the day, I am going to honor this request.

Okay, enough of mushy sentences, back to the subject: we can still live our life and be independent while living with our parents. Sure, we still have the "fear" of doing something we have been told we shouldn't do, for example, getting a tattoo. There is still the "I don't want to embarrass myself in front of my parents:" which I have totally done a couple of times. No, I didn't have to ask for permission to go out, but I did have to tell my mom where I was going and if I was coming home. That's fair. Oh, and I couldn't miss school; it was my choice to spent the whole night out and about, but school was a MUST.
I totally get where my husband comes from. I understand what he means by being independent and relaying on yourself. I didn't have the chance to live on my own or with roommates (part of me wishes I would have). I moved out because I wanted to start living my life as a flamboyant homosexual - KIDDING! but I did move in with my now husband. My brothers were very supportive even when I felt guilty for "leaving them behind." I felt guilty for not being able to provide for the family anymore as I would have expenses of my own... and this is another topic that it's misunderstood by other cultures.
Why do we have to take over the financial responsibilities when our parents are capable of working? We don't have to, but we pitch in. It's like living with roommates, except you will have to see them for years to come even if you moved out. There might be cases where this financial issue might be a true statement, I could possibly fall in this category myself for one or another reason; yet, I still do not find (and there isn't) anything wrong with that. What do you all think?

At the end of the day, though....

[ ...Relax. Take it Easy. ]

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